Coach's Wife becomes Player's Mom??!!

Number 9 had been looking forward to the first game for a couple of weeks now. I was glad to see him excited. Coach may not have shared his exact degree of enthusiasm, for a couple of reasons. First, 6 practices is hardly enough to get nine and ten-year-old boys game ready. Secondly, Coach has been working on teaching skills and fundamentals, and these don't necessarily translate into wins in games.

All the same, it was time to take the court. The little Bobcats fell short by 3 in the game at Wedowee, but from what I remember about the last time I saw Dev play in  a youth league game, it looked a lot like a win to me. Our guys looked like a basketball team. They were nervous and made some mistakes, but I was really impressed with their effort and discipline. They may or may not win games, but it is clear that they are learning. And, in case anyone forgets, that is why we play youth league.

I've been married to a coach for eleven years, so I consider myself something nearing an expert on how to handle that side of wins and losses. But, I have a lot to learn about being the mother of an athlete. Our boys have played sports their since age 6. This, though, is the first time I can tell that it really matters to Devin. He's not just out there for the fun of it. He's competitive. He gets that honestly. And, he's worked incredibly hard at practice. Winning matters to him.

As soon as the game was over, I could tell that Devin was disappointed. He had that look of dejection on his face. In the car, he didn't want to talk about the game. I was very proud of how he'd played. especially on defense. But, when he finally opened up at his dad's insistence, he said he was upset because he didn't get the ball any. His dad discussed with him why he didn't and the importance of being more aggressive and other basketball related things. At home, he was still sullen and quiet. Coach and I both kinda got on him about not getting so upset over it. Then, I thought about the ways we deal with losses on 'the big field' and asked Coach if that, not being upset about losing, was really our post-game policy. He pointed out that Devin could be mad, but he had to talk to him. They needed to discuss the games and practices right after and move on. I realized that I needed to get out of the way.

I've often wondered how Coach would handle the distinction between the father-son and the coach-player relationships. I trust that he can figure all that out. Devin is learning how to be part of a team and deal with the disappointments that are sometimes a part of it. He'll find his own way for handling it. I've got to figure out how to be the mother of an athlete. Mine my be the most challenging task of them all.